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There are a plethora of wonderful mindsets and mantras out there for making the most of your morning (the 5 a.m. club, make your bed, “wake and win”). However, there is a period of time at the end of the previous day that is not given near enough importance, in my opinion. And I’m not just talking about the things recommended to do to prepare for sleep; ie don’t eat after 9 p.m., take a warm bath, no screens an hour before bed, etc. Instead, what I’m referring to are the quiet moments of calming preparation at the end of the day. Call it “nighttime nesting”…if you will.

My reasons for participating in these rituals are not purely for the checking of boxes, but a powerful contribution to regulating my nervous system–something I went most of my life without knowing how to do. Always on edge, jumpy, anxious, scattered, the feeling of being unsettled often. These are just some of the ways a dysregulated nervous system shows up in the body, meaning it’s not just all in your head. The term “feeling fried” seems very appropriate when describing the feeling of having loose electrical wires flailing about from your core, ready to zap and short-circuit everything at a moment’s notice!

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One explanation states: A dysregulated nervous system means your body’s stress response (fight-or-flight/freeze) gets stuck on high alert or shuts down, failing to return to calm after threats, leading to anxiety, exhaustion, numbness, irritability, poor sleep, and heightened reactions to minor stressors. It’s an imbalance between the sympathetic (stressed) and parasympathetic (rest) systems, often caused by chronic stress, trauma, burnout, or sensory overload, manifesting as feeling constantly overwhelmed or completely disconnected.

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Basically…just by being a human in the chaotic world we live in makes it difficult to stay regulated, especially if you are a sensitive being, like myself. Adding to the complexity of it, people who have experienced trauma can have altered brain structures like the hippocampus and prefrontal cortex, and heightened stress responses, making it even more difficult to identify a safe event from an unsafe one. (If you feel that your nervous system issues stem from traumatic events or other mental-health struggles, please seek counsel. The recommendations below are not intended to replace professional help.)

The good news is, there are things you can do for your nervous system, ways to nurture a sense of peace and contentment (which you may have thought was unattainable up until now). But as I can attest, by integrating small, purposeful moments into your routine at the right times, you can begin to foster a sense of safety that will allow your nervous system to slow down, and slowly heal. One of the more important implementations for me has been to cultivate a very intentional evening, full of rituals that bring grounding and familiarity.

Here are some of the ways I lay my day to rest…so that my mind and body can too:

• Take time to tidy the main living space-as I begin to end the day, I spend several minutes repositioning the throw pillows and neatly folding the blankets on the sofa in our living room. I straighten the coffee table, clear clutter from the end tables, and make sure to leave the space visually appealing for the next day. It’s a peaceful, rhythmic routine that brings closure, but also creates a welcoming space for the following morning when I curl up with my devotionals and sip my nootropic coffee. Win-win!
• Write your to-do list for the following day-I write out the routine things I will do in the morning (including devotionals and exercising), and any pressing tasks I know have to get done, or that I would like to happen. By putting them down on paper, they are out of my mind, and waiting for me where (and when) they belong.
• Listen to white noise-before and during sleep, white noise provides a constant, balanced blend of all audible frequencies, which effectively “washes out” or masks sudden, distracting sounds, creating a more stable and predictable sound environment for the brain. 
• Create a “shut down” routine-while this might look different for someone who suffers with OCD, for me, having a systematic order for locking the exterior doors, putting electronics to sleep, and turning off lights allows me to say goodnight to our home, and to rest assured (literally!) that all is buttoned up.
• Choose a bedtime scent-sometimes this can be achieved in a warm bath with lavender infused Epsom salts, but even on the nights when I don’t soak I still like to take time to smell the roses, so to speak. In addition to lavender there are other particular ones associated with sleep, like chamomile, sandalwood, and Jasmine. However, it can be any scent that brings you into the present, and that signals to your brain that it’s time to relax.
• Engage in physical touch-whether it’s a long hug standing in the kitchen at the end of the day with my husband, or stroking my daughter’s hair while I say goodnight, or snuggling with my pup before putting him in his crate…spending a few minutes engaged in physical connection with a loved one calms and grounds the nervous system and releases the feel-good hormones oxytocin (the “cuddle hormone”) dopamine, and serotonin, promoting bonding, happiness, and relaxation. It simultaneously reduces cortisol, (the primary stress hormone), leading to lower blood pressure, reduced anxiety, and improved immune function. Talk about being ready for bed!

By practicing some of these rituals, and creating your own, not only will you give yourself the gift of a better night’s sleep, but over time you will signal to your nervous system that it is safe enough to truly rest. Once you achieve that level of equilibrium, a good night’s sleep will take on whole new meaning, and it is the most wonderful thing you can do for yourself!

I’d love to hear the ways you nest at night…won’t you share? 🙂